Why Chris Rock may be Emerging as the Leader We Need
When I saw Will Smith slap Chris Rock I remember feeling sad for both men. I wondered to myself how is Chris Rock supposed to get his dignity back after that!? Moments later, when I watched Will Smith yell from his seat, I felt sick inside. It felt like something precious had died and I had no words to describe what had been lost. All I knew was that the world had changed and there did not seem to be a way back to what was and what could have been.
I realize now that I had a similar feeling when I heard about Bill Cosby even though what he did was much more harmful and grotesque. As a young black man in the late 1970’s I had always felt a point of personal pride when other black men were honored and admired by millions of white people. Even though I know that I need to get my validation internally, people like Muhammed Ali and Bill Cosby provided a lift in my lowest moments in those lonely and desperate years. Moreover, they did this just by occupying strong, sought-after positions in the public perception. Both Chris Rock and Will Smith have provided that lift for me in the past and their rising stars held the promise that they would continue to do that for me long into the future.
After watching the incident, I had the sense that I was witnessing the passing away of all of that promise as feelings of grief sickened and drained me for days. But then I read about Chris Rock’s first performance after the slap. He told the people there that he was still processing what had happened and they responded by giving him three standing ovations. He became misty eyed but went on to have a very funny set according to those that attended.
The bravery and grace that Chris Rock showed by stepping onto that stage in the first place deserves at least three standing ovations but his actions before, during and after that show merit much more. It has now come out that Chris Rock was the one that campaigned behind the scenes to ensure that Will Smith was not arrested or removed from the hall after the incident. Then during the show after someone yelled out “F — k Will Smith” he responded by saying “No No No No No”.
Chris Rock may still be processing but it seems to me that his intuitive guidance is doing just fine in real time. Immediately after the incident many were either taking Will Smith’s side or screaming for his arrest. Most comedians seem to be outraged at the assault while many others see the lack of punishment as a slippery slope that will lead to many more violent assaults. There did not seem to be a middle ground or even a reason why one should be sought out. Even so, that middle ground is what Chris Rock’s actions have been pointing to all along.
When I think of Chris Rock pleading Will Smith’s case backstage or taking to the stage to perform his set with such class, I feel a kind of quiet strength that is beyond words. And while there are many words that could describe why this might be happening, they all feel very inadequate right now. There is just something about his passion that speaks to a deeper purpose that somehow feels right about this moment. It feels like there is much more to what is happening than the incident itself.
The things that come up for me are the racial interactions I have had in my life that left me feeling demoralized, ashamed or even frustrated and hostile. I have had police officers stop me for no apparent reason, while others have approached me with their weapons drawn and spoken to me in a very aggressive way. My brother, who lives in Montreal, had a police officer follow him home in his car and knock on his door to demand identification. A steady diet of these small interactions has often left me feeling like a ticking time bomb and I am sure that many young black men have felt the same way.
I still get nervous around police because there is a feeling in the air that they will do something to disrespect me and there is nothing I can do about it since they will just kill me and fabricate evidence. Even if this fear is no longer rational it still persists and is strongest whenever there is a perceived expectation that I challenge the police or other transgressors as is the case if I am accompanying a woman. In those situations, the emotion rears up over me like a terrifying presence that has already judged me inadequate. It actually sometimes feels like I have to do something or die a thousand deaths because of the shame. Over the years, I imagine that I and many other black men have died millions of deaths with no way of releasing the building darkness that has formed as a result.
But when I think of Chris Rock pleading Will Smith’s case it feels like he is pleading all our cases. It feels like he gets it and understands how important this moment could be. This incident may present an opportunity for the country to expose old festering wounds and start a healing process that is long overdue. The comedian seems made for this because of his demonstrated toughness and resolve. These are qualities that he will need since the road ahead is sure to be filled with land mines placed there by the messianic cancel culture that still dominates the public discourse.
An even more daunting obstacle may be finding a road to redemption necessary to gain that middle ground. Many people make a solid case that if this is not prosecuted swiftly and fairly then it will open the door to more and more violent actions. It seems very wrong that Will Smith should escape justice because he is a celebrity with power and influence. In the face of these arguments, it is difficult to explain why redemption should even be considered as part of the solution at this point even if you assume that what Chris Rock did before the incident was also very wrong.
Even so I am beginning to have a sense of something very useful and profound in the landscape up ahead. That is what great leaders and visionaries do, they fill you with hope and promise by the way that their words and actions seem to be almost divinely aligned with something good that we all feel inside. I can easily imagine Chris Rock in a Netflix special a few months from now interviewing Will Smith so that they can both relive the incident in front of us while describing what thoughts and feelings were going on inside of them.
Will Smith has unique characteristics, skills and a massive following that can all be leveraged for good if given the right opportunity to help those who need it most. Right now there are tens of millions of men, black and white, who could benefit from a vision of another way forward if it were modeled by Will Smith. They are trapped in prisons made of brick and mortar or the much stronger and ancient prisons formed by the expectations of society that tell them that death is better than dishonor. Imagine how transformed the country could become if these men found a way forward that could benefit all of society including the most vulnerable. Will Smith can still be subject to justice that is fair while the same society that judges him benefits greatly from the redemption that it offers him.
This is about much more than what society considers moral or socially just, this is about opportunity. It is easy to get mired in feelings of resentment and outrage when you stand on what is considered solid moral high ground. But time has shown that almost all ground that was considered unassailable and righteous in the past has been revealed to be instead lodged in the depths of a dark pit. Much of what was considered moral fifty years ago is unthinkable today so why should it not be so fifty years from now of what is considered moral today. Our current so-called moral high ground is mostly likely a pit of our own making that prevents us from seeing the fertile ground that could lead us away from the failed patterns of a fearful world to something where new, more useful patterns will grow.
The possibility of Chris Rock somehow maintaining his dignity or Will Smith finding a road to redemption seemed very remote not that long ago. The bold comedian has changed all of that with his actions, his spoken words and the words he has left unspoken. And while others may see disaster followed by an apocalypse, Chris Rock is showing us that there is an opportunity here to face our darkness and come out of it healthier, stronger and more grounded in reality.
